Everywhere we turn we hear messages about who we should be.
Whether it’s our relationship status, the car we drive, or our body shape, images of perfection are all around us.
Many of us face a barrage of critical voices too.
People have opinions about the way our home looks, how our kids behave, and how we perform at work. It’s easy to feel inferior.
So how do we overcome this?
We need to base our security on a firmer foundation.
Something that doesn’t shift, change or move.
That foundation should be God’s standards, NOT the standards of others.
God’s standards never change (Malachi 3:6, Numbers 23:19, Hebrews 13:8, James 1:17).
They aren’t flawed—in fact, God even uses our flaws.
His standards come with a dose of mercy, grace, and forgiveness, so when we don’t meet the standards we can know that God will not write us off (Psalm 86:5, Psalm 145:8, Ephesians 2:4, Hebrews 4:16).
We can just get right back up and start again.
So how can we adopt new mindsets when it comes to insecurity and perfectionism?
The old computer phrase “garbage in, garbage out (GIGO)” rings true. If we’re constantly feeding on what everyone else tells us we should be, we won’t ever be able to be who God created us to truly be.
Why not reduce your intake of the things that make you feel inferior, whether on screens or IRL?
We need to learn to draw boundaries and say “no” when the expectations of others are too high. You are not Super(wo)man.
Sometimes the standards of others are wrong or flawed. Many build successful businesses and lives without a formal degree. Even in the Bible, Jesus’ disciples were from a variety of backgrounds, and many people God used had no special training.
The standards of others are always changing. The reality show Project Runway said it perfectly… “One day you’re in, the next day you’re out!” Why try and compete?
We, too, have unrealistic expectations of others. We need to do some self-examination. Sometimes we dislike the things in others that we are doing ourselves!
We need to stop comparing ourselves to others. We feel inferior when we measure ourselves against the standards of others.
We need to realise Satan will ALWAYS lie and tell us that we aren’t enough. We need to realise that God makes up our differences. When we aren’t enough, He fills the gap. His grace makes up for our weaknesses… “But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NIV)
Jerry Maguire lied. Only God can complete us. “And in Him you have been made complete, and He is the head over all rule and authority.” Colossians 2:10 (NASB)
We need to realise we are completely able with Christ. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13 (NKJV) and “But Jesus looked at them and said, “With men it is impossible, but not with God; for with God all things are possible.”” Mark 10:27 (NKJV)
Lastly, we need to get familiar with the RIGHT standards.
We need to spend regular time reading our Bibles and getting familiar with God’s standards. We also need to forgive ourselves when we don’t measure up…because God already did.
God bless you,